


the optimist

by redeyedwrath



Category: Fire Emblem: Fuukasetsugetsu | Fire Emblem: Three Houses
Genre: Almost Kiss, Canon Compliant, Garreg Mach Ball (Fire Emblem), Introspection, M/M, Pre-Timeskip | Academy Phase (Fire Emblem: Three Houses)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-26
Updated: 2020-07-26
Packaged: 2021-03-06 05:40:42
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,110
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25538203
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/redeyedwrath/pseuds/redeyedwrath
Summary: “Edelgard and I… We may have our differences, but I still have hope for a shared future. One that, if I had it my way, would include you, my friend.”“We’re friends, are we?” Claude asks, and hopes that Dimitri doesn’t take the opportunity to tear him apart.-A late night conversation between the heirs to two kingdoms
Relationships: Dimitri Alexandre Blaiddyd/Claude von Riegan
Comments: 11
Kudos: 66





	the optimist

**Author's Note:**

> I wrote this in a fugue state and posted it immediately afterwards so this is unbeta'd - please do not perceive me hhhh

The life we left behind  
Sleeping all our lives  
The life we left behind  
Dreaming all our lives

**— The Optimist, Anathema**

* * *

It’s cold on the balcony. The stone barrier absorbs the warmth of his hands, making them turn blue; the Almyran climate didn’t prepare Claude for the temperateness of Fódlan’s center. Stuck between the three countries, it sometimes felt like Garreg Mach was nothing at all. 

A group of students walks out of the hall, laughter echoing through the monastery. They’re leaning on each other, dresses and suits and all. 

Claude breathes in, then out again. The chilly air hangs in his lungs.

The door behind him opens and Claude looks over his shoulder to see Dimitri stepping out of the ballroom, face red and hair stuck to his forehead. 

“Ah, Claude!” he says. “Pardon me; I did not mean to intrude.”

Claude smiles at him, making sure the pit in his stomach doesn’t shine through. “You didn’t.”

He looks back to the dormitories, where his fellow students are making their last goodbyes. One of them leans forward to kiss the other on the cheek; they walk into the building hand in hand. Claude curls his fingers underneath his arms, trying to warm them up. 

There’s some shuffling behind him as the door closes. He smiles bitterly to himself. Good. 

“May I ask what’s on your mind?” Dimitri asks. Claude jumps; he’d thought Dimitri… But then, of course he hadn’t. Of course. 

Claude shrugs. “Oh. You know. The usual.”

“Ah,” Dimitri says. Then it’s silent. 

Dimitri is a warm presence next to him, glinting yellow and white and blue in the corner of his eye. He doesn’t seem cold at all. In his uniform, he seems more formal than ever, and yet.

Claude does not trust easily, but there is something about Dimitri that makes him think  _ Perhaps in another life, we might have... _

“Do you ever…” he starts, stupidly, before he can stop himself. Anything to distract from where his thoughts are going. 

“Yes?”

Dimitri turns to him, eyes wide and hopeful; he’s honest in a way that makes Claude want to withdraw. 

“I don’t know, it’s stupid.”

“Claude…” Dimitri says. His arm brushes against Claude’s as his chest expands. It takes everything Claude has not to lean into it. “Whatever concerns you have, feel free to raise them; I promise I do not judge.”

There’s a bitter edge to that statement, a roughness in Dimitri’s voice. It tugs at Claude’s consciousness and he turns it around in his head for a while. Sometimes, when Dimitri thinks no one’s paying close attention, he slips into something that makes Claude’s hair stand on end. 

“Do you ever worry what the future might bring?”

Dimitri sighs, staring off into the distance. The frown on his face makes Claude want to do stupid things. “All my life, I have known I must be King. And yet, now that I almost am…”

“Yeah…”

Silence again. Dimitri shuffles closer; their shoulders are touching now, fully. Claude lets him, heart in his throat, in his ears, beating in his fingers until they’re warm again. 

He should’ve just stayed silent until Dimitri left. This is… not a good idea. 

“Our situations may not be fully similar,” Dimitri says, “yet, I find it comforting to know that there is someone else out there struggling to deal with the responsibilities to come.”

_ Not fully similar _ , Claude thinks to himself. He lets his arms hang down at his sides, slowly, until his finger brushes against Dimitri’s. Dimitri stiffens next to him. 

“I do find myself wondering, what are you doing out here on a night like this?” 

“I could ask you the same.”

Claude hums. “You could.”

“I was…” Dimitri clears his throat, looking down at where their hands are touching. “...looking for you.”

_ A weakness _ , Claude’s mind supplies.  _ He saw you, looking pathetic, out here on your own. He’s looking for a weakness _ . 

“Now why would you be looking for me?” Claude teases, his voice calm. He presses closer to Dimitri until their fingers hook. A part of him wants this to stop. “You seemed to be getting pretty friendly with our empress.”

“Edelgard and I… We may have our differences, but I still have hope for a shared future. One that, if I had it my way, would include you, my friend.”

“We’re friends, are we?” Claude asks, and hopes that Dimitri doesn’t take the opportunity to tear him apart.

“Of course,” Dimitri says. His hand lands on Claude’s shoulder, warm and big and  _ warm _ , and he turns Claude around to face him. The look on his face is so open that it makes Claude want to vomit and he shifts, palms sweating. 

Dimitri’s handing Claude his heart on a silver platter; Claude’s breathless with it, heart lodged in his throat, he can’t swallow anymore  — all he can do is stare and watch as this disaster unfolds before him. 

“Claude, I — ” Dimitri says, and stops himself, cheeks a hot red. 

They’re standing on a precipice. 

This is such a bad idea. It’s such a phenomenally bad idea, and Claude can feel his hands shaking, and he still doesn’t stop himself. He leans forward, their chests brushing, their shoes touching, and Dimitri so fucking  _ close _ . 

Dimitri goes still, his blue eyes wide as Claude hovers so close to his mouth. Claude cannot help himself; he laughs a little, nerves getting the better of him, his heart dropping. Dimitri’s lips open, a puff of air, and then his nose touches Claude’s cheek.

If Claude leans a little closer, just a whisper, his mouth would touch the corner of Dimitri’s lips. 

A beam of light falls on them as the door opens  — making Dimitri jump away with a shocked look on his face, eyes wild and glinting in the sudden light. 

“Oh, there you are,” the professor says, their head peeking through the crack. “Dedue asked me to look for you.”

“Ah, yes, of course,” Dimitri says, voice low and intimate in a way that makes Claude cringe and want to touch him. “I probably should — ”

“Yeah,” Claude says. “You should.”

Dimitri casts one look back at him as he follows the professor back inside. He’s unreadable, for a change; Claude’s sure the heir to Faerghus is way more adept at hiding things he shouldn’t feel. 

He stays on the balcony until he can’t feel his face anymore and tries to pretend he isn’t disappointed. His heart should not be something given away so easily. He should not think about Dimitri like this  — there is something hanging over them, something big. 

He should… He should… He should not. 

And yet. 

**Author's Note:**

> So yeah. I wrote this while suffering from extreme head empty disease so I don't know how good it is but I tried to throw a bit of my Claude voice in there - hope this sounds good to you guys! Please leave me a comment if you are so inclined.
> 
> [Fic tweet](https://twitter.com/reverethedeer/status/1287529396220329991?s=20)


End file.
